S.T.R.E.S.S.

Isang malaking STRESS

Few days before the exact date of my debut, nagca-cram na ako. Nagca-cram sa schoolworks and pati na rin sa preparations. Traveling to and from Manila and Fairvew, I know na I don’t have that much time especially malapit na yung finals week and debut ko na rin. Thankfully, nairaos ko both of my activities despite of my jam packed schedule.

Going into details, I will share with you what went through my debut planning.

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Months Prior

When I was planning for my debut, I am too particular with what I want. I chose my own shoes. I designed and created my own invitation (all of those are handmade😉). Lastly, the souvenirs were made by mom.

Shoes

I actually spent a lot of weekends looking for a gown (my second gown) and shoes. I went to SM Fairview, Fairview Terraces, Robinson’s Novaliches, SM North Edsa, Trinoma and Robinson’s Place Manila. It was really tiring and stressful, imagine having to roam around those malls just to look for a pair of shoes and gown that fits my taste. Going around department stores and boutiques, I decided to select a pair of shoes from So Fab . I chose this black Marlo Block heels because it suits my style. I opted for block heels rather than a stiletto because I know that I’d be having lots of performances during my debut.I chose something that I am comfortable and confident wearing even if I’d be dancing.

Invitations

I made my own invitations since it cuts the cost and I can do it naman so why not? I remember na ginawa ko yung invitation layout sa Quezon, if I am not mistaken it was Holy Week. For the actual invitation (physical one), they are all handmade and I did all of those 😉 . I bought kraft cartolina, parchment paper, stamp (crown) and special paper at National Bookstore. On the other hand, I ordered the wax seal set at Shopee. I remember when I was younger, I was fond of Barbie movies and there’s this part na the king stamped his seal (parang signature) and super satisfying panoorin noong mismong wax HAHA and ayon I thought na I could incorporate the wax seal to my invitation. The abaca thread was bought from Divisoria and it’s really cheap!!

Basically, I cut those cartolinas,folded it into envelopes, pasted the inserts, printed out the layout and tadaaaaaaa!! I finally made my own invitation !!!!

Souvenirs

Mom and Dad made the souvenirs. Dad was in charge of the layout and printing while mom was the one who put the bottle, glitters, tag, abaca thread and seal altogether. Handmade ulit lahat ng souvenirs ++ made with love because Mom finished all of it <3 . The tag was color blue since motif is actually blue x pink , we added some silver glitters to give an effect then attached the tag to the cork . The part wherein the tag needs to be attached to the cork was the hardest because it required some force. To finish it off, an abaca thread was tied around the bottle and a wax seal with the letter ‘L’ attached to it.

Cake

For the whole debut preparation, I’ve been getting inspirations from Pinterest. It actually helped me sort my ideas for my debut and I found this cake on that site. Since I want things to be blue or pink, I chose this cake because it screams elegance to me!!! I really love it. I really love how how blue and gold was mixed in this cake. It’s simple yet I am really contented with how it looks and tastes!!!

Catering and Event Styling

Dad’s the one who was in charge of looking for caterers and good thing he found K8er Catering Services. Mrs. Sarmiento was really nice and she asked me about the things that I want. She also adjusted some things para magfit sa budget since di naman ako rk HAHHAHAHAHA . I prefer the simple yet elegant look. The menu was decided by my parents; the motif was of course decided by me – it’s pink x blue; the stage design was made by them; they were also the ones who took care of the cake, I just sent the design that I liked; and lastly, the 18 candles and roses was also in their care.

Venue
Choosing a venue took me a lot of time!! I actually found an events place along Commonwealth Area but the sad thing is, wala na yung date na gusto ko so I looked for another and it brought me here!! Thankfully, I found Villa Infant Jesus Pavilion and I really loved their glass windows !! They also have the pavilion area but I chose this aircon venue since my birthday is on Summer and I don’t want my guests to feel uncomfortable due to the temperature. So thereee, I chose this place because I loved the ambiance and the ceiling. The place was already elegant thus the styling could be minimal. It can also accommodate up to 200 guests for the whole aircon venue. I booked the place on September which is actually 8 months prior to the event but let me tell you, sobrang hassle magpabook ng place!!

During that time, their package includes the lights and sounds plus the photobooth if you booked for the whole venue. I am just not so sure if it is still applicable until now but you can ask them for their rates if you are interested 😉

Song

The song that I’ve written entitled ‘Hold My Hand’ was supposed to be used for my pre-debut video. Sadly, due to time constraints and since I’m super busy, it did not fit into my schedule so I have to let go of the pre-debut shoot.

I wrote this song with Got7’s BamBam as my inspiration.To be honest, it’s hard for me to write songs that has a bright feeling, it’s easier for me to write sad songs tho HAHAHHAHAH but then, it took me awhile before I was able to finish the lyrics and melody. I thought about how Bamie and the rest of the boys came into my life, what kind of situation we have now and my real feelings for him. I just poured my heart out when I was writing the lyrics. I thought about the things that I want to convey to him.

Another reason why I decided to write a song because I want it to serve as a gift to those 7 boys. My birthday which falls on the 9th of May is also Got7’s fandom’s anniversary – iGot7/Ahgase’s anniversary and I want to use this song to remind me that I am fated to be a part of this fandom. Like, the anniversary falls on birthday??? Then the fandom color is green and the birthstone for May is Emerald. So thereeeee, I wrote this for GOT7, for BamBam and for the Ahgases. I also want to remind myself that I love making music and it’ll always be a part of me.

Special thanks to Jude !! He helped me with the chords and recording T_T If it wasn’t for him, I wouldn’t be able to finish this!!

Gown

I had my gown tailored at Divisoria because why not? It costs less and I was able to get the gown that I like! I think nagpasukat ako way back March and nakuha ko yung gown by April. I had to make sure na prepared na yung gown ko because I can’t afford to cram it HHAHAHAHA. I chose this shade of blue because I think it complements my skin color and nagsawa na ako sa pink hehe. Another trivia (hehe), I wrote a story at wattpad before (2015? I think?) and there’s this part na yung heroine had her party and she wore a blue gown while all of her guests wore pink and silver so I guess I already had my mind set way back then kung ano ang magiging motif ng debut ko HAHHAHAHAH

Noong pumipili ako ng design ng gown, I decided na ayoko ng long trail gown or kahit yung sobrang laking ball gown because I want to be comfortable pag sumayaw na sa 18 roses. Another thing is , instead of an off-shoulder gown, I opted for a long sleeves na lace. I am not sure kung ano yung tawag doon hehe but I personally love the see-through na sleeves.

For my second gown, the black and white one, sobrang nakakastress maghanap nito. Habang naghahanap ako ng shoes , naghahanap din ako ng 2nd gown and super hirap kasi ang arte ko HAHAHHAHA. Late ko na rin na realize na I’d be using 2 gowns kaya nag-cram na ako dito. I bought this from Trinoma and wala siyang see-through na sleeves. Ipinatahi ko lang siya sa labas since I really love the sheer effect.

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May 12, 2018

On the day of my debut, I went to school early in the morning and took the quizzes that were needed for that day. When I was done with all the requirements I went home immediately. When I arrived, we started printing out the guest lists and other stuff needed. I also took a bath ,fixed myself and prepared the clothes that I need for the event later!!

By 3 pm, we left the house and went to Marikina, but on our way biglang umulan!!! That time, I started to overthink (talent ko yun eh haha), I thought about lots of what ifs GHAAAAD. Friends chat me and parang ayoko i-open isa isa kasi baka sabihin nilang hindi sila makakapunta and that’d be sad :< Pero ayon, I don’t have any other choice but to check their messages and I felt so relieved when they just notified me na they’ll be late. At least, they will still go hihi. Medyo na-traffic din kami on our way but when we arrived , wala pa si ate Jaica :((( Wala pang magma-make up sa akin so paano na yung pre-event shoot?????

I told my sister, my cousin and my niece to practice their blocking para sa prod number namin. On the other hand, ate Rhea was in charge of the guest list, 18s and such. Nagset-up na rin for the guest book but it’s not really a book type , I chose Jenga Blocks instead. Super stressed na talaga ako that time ++ frustrated as well kasi ang daming nasasayang na time.I really want to follow the schedule because I want to start early. I want to respect people’s time but ayon we waited until ate Jaica arrived and she started doing my make-up which is I think around 5 pm na.

Photographer

Ayo Fotografi – Affordable Photo and Video Coverage was the one who covered my debut. Sir Ayo Aueluz and Sir Ian Prima were the ones in charge of the photo and video coverage. They were already at Villa Infant when we arrived. I was supposed to have my pre-event shoot but then, too bad we weren’t able to have it because I finished with make-up preparations by 6 pm and it was already dark outside. Sir Ayo and Sir Ian were really nice and I remember how they smile all the time haha. We had a little photoshoot inside the waiting room and it was really awkward for me (At first) HAHAHAHA!! But since they were too nice I found it comfortable to pose in front of the camera after some time (I guess?)

Make-up Artist

Ate Jaica has been doing my make-up since my Center for Pop days in 2016. She’s really good in this craft and I can really say na nagmumukha akong tao pag siya nagma-make up sa akin HHAHAHAHHA. Honestly, I really don’t have any idea when it comes to choosing colors especially in make up. I don’t know kung ano ba babagay sa akin or what but ate Jaica always makes sure that the make-up she puts on me accentuates my skin color. Ate Star also helped in fixing my hair hehe <3 They also helped me in wearing my gown <3 <3 <3 Thank you ate Jaica and ate Star !! Next event po ulit hehehehhe

Emcee

Ms. Gem was the one in charge of hosting debut. Days prior to the event, she helped with the modifications of my sample program. She also suggested ideas and other stuff and listened to the things that I want to do as well. It was nice working with Ms. Gem and her hosting skills were good.

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When everything was done, hindi pa agad nagumpisa and super naiinip and inaantok na ko. Knowing how much of an overthinker I am, I keep on having thoughts na things wouldn’t go well. Kasi with since the preparations until the moment na hinihintay ko na lang magstart never ata akong na-excite HAHAHA I feel stressed all the time pero ayon I don’t have any other choice but to push through with this plan since I started it already.

After awhile, Ms. Gem went to the waiting room and told me that we will start the program at any moment. The lights were turned off so it’s my cue to go outside – holding my mic on the right hand, I told myself that this is it. I stood at the entrance and there’s this nervousness that I felt since it’s the first time that I’ll be singing my self-composed song entitled ‘Hold My Hand’. But then, as soon as I heard the music, that nervousness slowly turned into excitement and I always loved that shift in feelings.

For a moment, I felt excited and I actually enjoyed singing that song. I was so happy. I was so happy because I was able to sing in front of the people who didn’t know that I composed this song HAHHAHAHAHHA JK . When I finished my entrance and song number , the host told the guests that I composed this song and even my parents didn’t know it (I think? haha). I guess I surprised you guys? hihi nevertheless, I was really happy.

18 Roses

I have a story on why I chose blue roses instead of pink ones. Last Valentine’s day, I was tasked to buy flowers for mom and every bouquet seems similar to me. You know, sunflower was really popular at that time and syempre common naman na sa paningin natin yung red roses. I kept on looking for something that will suit my taste and tadaaaaaa!! I found a bouquet of blue roses <3

Fast Forward to Got7‘s promotion of ‘Look’. Of course I was really excited during that time and while watching the music video BamBam’s part came and I was SHOOKT ?!?!?! He was holding a flower similar to the one that I picked last Valentine’s T___T So ayon feeling ko na naman nakatadhana kami HAHAHAHHAHA JKJK Because of that, I decided to push through with the blue roses <3

Going back, I actually prepared a song list for my 18 roses but sadly a mix up happened so di nasunod yung playlist ko. I danced with my Lolo Colas, Ninong Uding, Lambert, Kuya Toto then Coco!!! It was funny because few days before my debut, I told him na magpractice kami hahahaha pero ayaw niya then during my debut he cried, not because di siya marunong sumayaw but nahihiya raw siya HAHAHA. Then the following day sabi niya hindi na raw siya nahihiya ghaaad , itong batang to HAHHAHA.

I danced with Gab as well. Next one is Dela!!! He’s a really good dancer and I’m really thankful na he’s always game when it comes to dancing. Martson was next then Juancho, Von Marc, Jerome, Owie and si Athan !!! It was funny tho hahahhaha he never failed to make me smile naman as always, he tiptoed while we were dancing and I went down a little. I am wearing heels kaya I’m taller than him but since gusto niya mas matangkad siya sa akin, yan yung nangyari hahahhahaha

It was Aaron who went next, followed by Tristan, Robin, Wayne and then Dad. While Dad and I were dancing I told him na I should be singing for him but then, my playlist got mixed up so I guess I have to do it some other time 🙁 That was actually the first time that Daddy and I got to dance :((((

18 Candles

My 18 candles was full of “wag na kayong mag-away ni Meg” HAHAHHAHAA. I don’t deny it naman but maybe ganoon lang talaga pag magkapatid hehehehhe. Meg gave her message then Lian, Dadang, Lorifel, and Amanda!!! After 4 years, ngayon na lang ulit kami nagkita T____T Next is Nicholle, Melanie, Jylah, Ate Meyrill, Jhaemie, Stef, Ronalyn then Ana!!! Super love ko yung message ni Ana because of ‘Never Ever’ yieeeee <3 Riri followed, then Christine, Angelou, Ate Bibe and lastly si Franchezka – Nikka I mean hehehhee.

Isa si Nikka sa reason kung bakit pink yung motif ko. She really doesn’t like to wear pink so this is my chance to let her wear my fave color HAHAHHAHAHA On a serious note, I’d always be thankful for having her as my best gal and syempre thank you for being with me while I am so stressed with things – including the debut preps

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An AVP Presentation that Dad made was played after the 18 candles. It was a collection of photos since my childhood and also some milestones in my life. In the end there’s a video of BamBam (it was one of the clips during Real GOT7 era hehehehhe, yes dad I know where you got that vid) and it’s dubbed with a birthday greeting in Korean language haha. I found it funny yet touching at the same time because I know Dad really put in some effort knowing how busy he is.

We took lots of group pictures and there are these 2 instances that I can’t forget.

• I invited my elem friends and I made a mistake hahahaha. I forgot to send the invites to Frans and Gabe so at the exact day of my debut (that morning), doon ko lang naalala na may namiss pala ako !!(good thing I opened my twt acct)I invited them on that day and good thing they made it!!! I am really thankful that they went huhu <3 <3 <3
• Mom said that we should take a family picture so umupo si Meg sa tabi ko and pumwesto na rin si Mommy and Daddy. Before taking a picture , Sir Ayo asked if 2 lang daw kami ni Meg hahahhaha I find it cute tho kasi akala ata ni Sir Ayo kapatid namin si Lian and Dadang HAHHAHAHAH. Lagi kasing magkakasama yung tatlo

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18 Blue Bills

18 Blue Bills followed and I remember Ninang Percing being teary-eyed hihi. I know she wants to tell me lots of things but her eyes already conveyed those to me. She’s like my second mother and standing before her, all grown-up made her proud (I guess HAHAHHAA Please agree ninang :D). Ate Lyn was actually the first one then followed by Ninang, Tita Liza, Ninang Vivian, Tita Darlyne, Ate Star, Ninang Gem, Kuya Mark, Sir Joc, Ninong Melvin, Ninang Jerri, Ninang Nellie , Ninong Kiko, Ninang Noemi and Tita Mylah.

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After the Blue Bills, our cover group named ShAngRiLa (stands for SHane, ANGelou, RIri and LAurn) performed Blackpink’s So Hot and As If It’s Your Last. This is the second prod that we prepared and we performed the first song with live vocals hehehhe. It’s the first time that we did that (singing and dancing at the same time) and I think we really enjoyed it!! I totally enjoyed it!!

Even though it’s not that perfect, it was fulfilling. We really never got the chance to practice as a whole. Palagi kaming kulang ng isa and noong nakumpleto kami, mga 30 minutes lang yon then after a while, 3 na lang ulit kami hahhaha. Our schedules didn’t fit well during those times but still, we made it!!! Watch out for our future dance prods hahhahaha

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18 Treasures

Ate Rhea was the first one, then Ate Jhe, MJ, Audi, Matt, Hyrone, France, Vernon, Angelo, Paul, Lizzie, Jadezel, Kathleen, Shane, Aaron and Ian. Audrey was included in the list but Ms. Gem skipped her name :((( I was shookt as well when I realized it after the party but I’m also thankful because Audrey understood the situation <3.

When Angelo aka Poks gave me a message, I really find it sweet. It’s because aside from greeting me, he also greeted the mother’s out there a ‘Happy Mother’s Day’. It was funny yet touching at the same time. Honestly, I find him very thoughtful during that time :))

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When all of the 18s are done, I was asked to give a thank you speech but since I was too overwhelmed, I cannot find the right words to say. I made it short but sweet <3 ( I will still post a thank you article after this one 😉 )

Finally, the time for the last prod has come!!! Before opening the dance floor, my prod team (Dela x ShAngRiLa x Meg, Lian & Dadang) prepared a dance number. It’s a remix of Tomorrow, Today x Twinkle x Gashina x Bboom Bboom. We really practiced so hard and I am so happy because it turned out well <3

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I am so much grateful to everyone who made that night special for me ^^

It was really a fun and fulfilling night, I am so happy because you were there. Even though stressful at the start, it turned out to be one of the happiest nights of my life. Thank you for reading up until this part!! All the love <3

I will try to release a good version of Hold My Hand, please wait for it!! <3

“Because you were there – I was happy.”

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‘Belle Danse’ – or a Beautiful Dance is how I am able to describe that night. It was magical,fulfilling and wonderful. My heart was happy, it’s because you were there.